Enjoying reading the essay, makes me smile. This question (and disclaimer) is interesting one from a 'dude' perspective. Forces me to think again about initial attraction, lust / love, comfort, complacency and then new (?) attractors for us guys in later living.

Certainly not about sex but it is about appreciating other people who look after themselves - physically, mentally feeding emotional wellbeing (no one needs a moody or grumpy old sot as chosen company?). All comes to where we seek our drivers. Our spiritual source and this most definitely requires different stimulations well beyond riding by and making comments on physique no matter our preferences and likes.

Nice piece - the writing